https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-8015469/Labour-hopeful-Lisa-Nandy-backs-abolishing-monarchy.html

'I’d quite like to see Queen Meghan at some point': Labour hopeful Lisa Nandy says she would like to abolish the monarchy but admits she wouldn't mind if Prince Harry and Meghan Markle took the throne

    Lisa Nandy said that as a 'democrat' she would vote to abolish the UK monarchy
    Rival Rebecca Long-Bailey refuses to name a favourite former Labour leader
    Ms Long-Bailey also desperately tried to distance herself from Jeremy Corbyn

By Jack Maidment, Deputy Political Editor For Mailonline and David Wilcock, Whitehall Correspondent For Mailonline

Published: 09:31, 18 February 2020 | Updated: 16:07, 18 February 2020

Labour leadership challenger Lisa Nandy has said she would vote to abolish the monarchy at a referendum but admitted she would 'quite like to see' Meghan Markle one day become Queen.  Ms Nandy told a televised hustings event last night that as a 'democrat' she would vote to 'scrap' the Royal family but revealed a soft spot for the Duke and Duchess of Sussex.  It came as her rival, Rebecca Long-Bailey, refused to pick a favourite former leader of the Labour Party as she continued to try to distance herself from Jeremy Corbyn.   The shadow business secretary who gave Mr Corbyn a ten out of ten ratings for his leadership after he led the party to its worst election results since the 1930s proclaimed: 'There is no such thing as Corbynism.' 

Ms Nandy and Ms Long-Bailey are two of the final three candidates in the race to replace Mr Corbyn.  Sir Keir Starmer, the shadow Brexit secretary, is the third person still in the running and he is the overwhelming favourite to win the top job.  Ms Nandy risked derailing her campaign after she admitted she wanted to abolish the monarchy.  A YouGov poll published in May 2018 revealed that more than two thirds (69 per cent) of Britons consider themselves to be monarchists while just 21 per cent do not want a Royal family.  The trio of leadership rivals was asked at a Channel 4 Labour leadership debate how they would vote if there was a referendum on keeping the Royal family.  Ms Nandy replied: 'I'm a democrat, so I would vote to scrap it. But this is not the priority of the country.' 

But she added: 'I'd quite like to see Queen Meghan at some point.' 

Sir Keir said he would not vote to scrap the monarchy but said he would 'downsize it'.  Ms Long-Bailey said 'we have got more important things to worry about' but insisted she 'wouldn't vote to abolish the monarchy'.

Meanwhile, the challengers were also asked to name their favourite Labour leader from the last 50 years.

Ms Nandy picked veteran Labour MP Barbara Castle and described her as the best leader Labour never had while Sir Keir opted for Harold Wilson who was PM in the 1960s and 1970s.

But Ms Long-Bailey declined to choose anyone. None of the trios mentioned Tony Blair, Labour's most electorally successful leader, or Mr Corbyn.  Ms Long-Bailey has the backing of the current party leadership in the race to succeed Mr Corbyn.  But she has repeatedly insisted she is not the 'continuity Corbyn' candidate despite her long-standing backing for the incumbent and her commitment to continuing with his policies.   Last night she again tried to put open water between her and Mr Corbyn as she claimed 'Corbynism' does not exist.  She said: 'There is no such thing as Corbynism. There are our Labour values.  If we believe in building more council homes, investing in our futures through education and industrial strategy that's socialism. That's not Corbynism and we shouldn't throw away those policies.'

Voting in the Labour leadership contest starts on February 24 and stops on April 2 with a winner due to be announced on April 4.  The deadline to proceed to the final round of the contest was last Friday when Emily Thornberry fell just short of making it through.  Candidates needed to secure the backing of a selection of major unions or alternatively secure the support of at least 33 constituency Labour parties to progress.  Sir Keir, Ms Nandy and Ms Long-Bailey all won major union backing as well as CLP support.  But Ms Thornberry did not receive any major union backing and then failed to hit the magic number of CLPs.

Labour's record of opposing the monarchy

*  In January leadership outsider Clive Lewis called for a referendum about dumping the Royal Family as he defended Prince Harry and Meghan Markle. The left-wing former soldier, who was the first to drop out of the race, told an audience in Brixton, London: 'One of the things I always talk about is democracy. Why not have a referendum in this country on the future of the Royal family? We're a democracy, I'd rather see us as citizens than subjects.'
*  In 2015 Richard Burgon, who is now running to be Labour's deputy leader, called for the abolition of the monarchy before taking his oath of allegiance to the Queen. The then newly-elected MP for East Leeds declared that the Royals should be replaced by an elected head of state as he completed his swearing-in ceremony, saying: 'As someone that believes that the head of state should be elected I make this oath in order to serve my constituents.'
*  In 2017 then Labour MP Emma Dent Coad refused to apologise after mocking Prince Harry's Army career and accusing Prince Philip of cheating on the Queen. The Kensington MP, who lost her seat last December, abused the senior Royals at a fringe meeting at Labour's party conference in Brighton. She wrongly claimed Prince Harry was not qualified to fly Apache helicopters despite him deployed as a gunner to fight the Taliban in Afghanistan.
*   After becoming a Queen's Counsel a senior barrister in 2002, leadership front-runner Sir Keir Starmer told a magazine interviewer the decision was ‘odd’ as ‘I often used to propose the abolition of the monarchy’.
*  In 2002, a poll of backbench MPs found a majority wanted the monarchy to be stripped of its constitutional powers or abolished altogether. The Queen should have a purely ceremonial role, according to 44 of the 101 MPs questioned. Another 35 favoured a move to a republic, the survey for BBC1's On the Record programme showed.

Channel 4 Labour hustings key points:

    Reinforcing defeat: Rebecca Long-Bailey said 'there is not one [policy] that I would drop' when asked if she would drop any ideas from the last Labour manifesto which handed Boris Johnson an 80-seat majority.
    Yeah but no: 'We had people voting Tory in order to tell us that we had to change' Lisa Nandy disagreed with her somewhat bluntly
    'There is no such thing as Corbynism. There is our Labour values' - Ms Long-Bailey attacked the idea she is the Corbyn candidate
    No decriminalisation of cannabis: None of the candidates backed it, although Sir Keir came closest, saying he would not decriminalise it immediately.
    Don't mention Blair (or Corbyn):  None of the candidates said that triple-election winning PM Tony Blair or current party chief Jeremy Corbyn was Labour's best leader of the past 50 years.

Who has made it into the final round of the Labour leadership contest?

Voting in the Labour leader and deputy leader contests will start next Monday and close on April 2 with the winners announced on April 4.  There are three candidates in the running to replace Jeremy Corbyn: Sir Keir Starmer, Rebecca Long-Bailey and Lisa Nandy.  There are five candidates in the running to be the next deputy leader: Angela Rayner, Rosena Allin-Khan, Richard Burgon, Ian Murray and Dawn Butler.  Labour activists ditch 'Corbynism'.  Labour Party members appear to be abandoning the politics of Jeremy Corbyn in favour of a more moderate leader, a new analysis suggested today.  More than half of Constituency Labour Parties (CLPs) which backed Mr Corbyn in the leadership contest in 2015 have endorsed soft-left candidate, Sir Keir Starmer, this year.  And half of those who backed Mr Corbyn in the 2016 run-off against Owen Smith is also supporting the shadow Brexit secretary.  The numbers suggest he warrants his position as the bookies' favourite to take over, but they will be a blow to Rebecca Long-Bailey, who is being backed by Mr Corbyn's top team and hardline campaign group Momentum.  Ms Long-Bailey, the shadow business secretary, has praised the outgoing leader despite his massive election failure, rating his tenure as ten out of ten and suggesting he could have a place in her shadow cabinet.  Although not all Labour Party members have to be a member of a CLP and all can vote independently, the figures suggest the party could be ready for a less divisive and softer centre-left leader.

https://www.healthline.com/health/grief-widow-dating-after-decades-of-marriage#1

After Losing the Love of My Life, I’m Dating for the First Time in Decades

The Other Side of Grief is a series about the life-changing power of loss. These powerful first-person stories explore the many reasons and ways we experience grief and navigate a new normal. 

After 15 years of marriage, I lost my wife, Leslie, to cancer. We were best friends before we’d started dating.  For nearly 20 years, I only loved one woman: my wife, the mother of my children.  I was and still am grieving the loss of a woman who’d been the Robin to my Batman (her words, not mine) for nearly two decades.  Still, quite apart from missing the woman I loved, I miss having a partner. I miss the intimacy of a relationship. Someone to talk to. Someone to hold.  The leader of a grief support group I attended talked about the “stages” of grief but also suggested that it wasn’t as if you processed those stages linearly. One day maybe you raged, then the next you accepted your loss. But that didn’t necessarily mean you didn’t rage again the next day.  The group leader considered grief to be more of a spiral, winding ever closer to acceptance, but also taking trips through blame, negotiation, anger, and disbelief along the way.  I’m not sure I was ever on board with the spiral analogy.  My grief seemed like waves radiating out from a droplet of water in a larger pool. Over time, the waves would be smaller and further apart, then a new droplet would fall and start the process all over again a draining faucet trickling empty.  After some time, the droplets are less frequent, but I can never seem to quite fix the leak. It’s part of the plumbing now.  In many ways, you’re never “over” such an enormous loss. You just adapt to it.  And I suppose that’s where my daughters and I are now in our story of navigating our lives without Leslie.  If you’re never truly over someone you love passing away, does that mean you can never date again?

Never find another partner and confidante?

The idea that I had to make my peace with permanent loneliness because death had separated me from the woman I married was ridiculous, but figuring out when I was ready to date wasn’t easy.  When is it time to date?

When you lose someone, there’s a feeling of being under a microscope, your every move examined by friends, family, coworkers, and connections on social media.  Are you behaving appropriately? 

Are you mourning “correctly”?

Are you being too somber on Facebook?

Do you seem too happy?

Whether people are actually constantly judging or not, it feels like it to people who are mourning.  It’s easy to pay lip service to the sentiment, “I don’t care what people think.”

It was harder to ignore that some of the people who might be confused, concerned, or hurt by my decision to date would be a close family who’d also lost Leslie.  About a year after her death, I felt ready to start looking for another partner. Like grief, the timeframe for each individual’s readiness is variable. You might be ready two years later, or two months.  Two things determined my own readiness to date: I’d accepted the loss and was interested in sharing more than just a bed with a woman. I was interested in sharing my life, my love, and my family. The droplets of grief were falling less frequently. The waves of emotion that radiated out were more manageable.  I wanted to date, but I didn’t know if it was “appropriate.” It’s not that I wasn’t still grieving her death. But I recognized the very real possibility that my grief was part of me now, and that I’d never truly been without it again.  I wanted to be respectful to the other people in my wife’s life who’d also lost her. I didn’t want anyone to think that my dating reflected negatively on my love for my wife, or that I was “over it.”  But ultimately the decision came down to me. Whether others judged it appropriate or not, I felt I was ready to date.  I also believed I owed it to my potential dates to be as honest with myself as possible. They’d be taking their cues from my words and actions, opening up to me, and if all went well believing in a future with me that only existed if I was truly ready.  Why do I feel guilty?

What can I do about it?

I felt guilty almost immediately.  For nearly 20 years, I hadn’t gone on a single romantic date with anyone other than my wife, and now I was seeing someone else. I was going on dates and having fun, and I felt conflicted by the idea that I should enjoy these new experiences because they seemed purchased at the expense of Leslie’s life.  I planned elaborate dates for fun venues. I was going out to new restaurants, watching movies outside in the park at night, and attending charity events.      I started wondering why I’d never done the same things with Leslie. I regretted not pushing for those sorts of date nights. Too many times I left it to Leslie to plan.  It was so easy to get caught up in the idea that there would always be time for date nights later.  We never really considered the idea that our time was limited. We never made it a point to find a sitter so we could take time for us.  There was always tomorrow, or later, or after the kids were older.  And then it was too late. Later was now, and I’d become more of a caregiver than a husband to her in the last months of her life.  The circumstances of her health’s decline left us with neither time nor the ability to paint the town red. But we were married for 15 years.  We got complacent. I got complacent.  I can’t change that. All I can do is recognize that it happened and learn from it.  Leslie left behind a better man than the one she married.  She changed me in so many positive ways, and I’m so grateful for that. And any feelings of guilt I have about not being the best husband I could have been to her have to be tempered with the idea that she just hadn’t finished fixing me yet.  I know Leslie’s life’s purpose wasn’t to leave me a better man. That was just a side effect of her caring, nurturing nature.  The longer I date, the less guilty I feel the more natural it seems.  I acknowledge the guilt. I accept that I could have done things differently, and apply myself to the future.  The guilt wasn’t because I wasn’t ready, it was because by not dating, I hadn’t yet dealt with how it would make me feel. Whether I’d waited 2 years or 20, eventually I’d have felt guilty and have needed to process it.  Being ready to date and being ready to bring your date back to your house are two very different things.  While I was ready to put myself back out there, my house remained a shrine to Leslie. Every room is filled with our family and wedding pictures.  Her nightstand is still full of photographs and books, letters, makeup bags, and greeting cards that’ve remained undisturbed for three years.  The guilty feelings of dating are nothing compared to the guilt of trying to figure out what to do with a 20 by 20 wedding photograph over your bed.  I still wear my wedding ring. It’s on my right hand, but it feels like such a betrayal to take it off entirely. I can’t quite part with it.  I can’t throw those things away, and yet some of them no longer fit the narrative that I’m open to a long-term relationship with someone I care about.  Having children simplifies the problem of how to handle it. Leslie will never stop being their mother despite her passing. Though wedding pictures might get stored away, the family pictures are reminders of their mother and her love for them and need to stay up.  Just as I don’t shy away from talking to the kids about their mother, I also don’t apologize for discussing Leslie with dates (I mean, not on the first date, mind you). She was and is an important part of my life and the lives of my children.  Her memory will always be with us. So we talk about it.  Still, I probably should clean and organize that nightstand one of these days.  There are other things to think about other milestones to address: Meeting the kids, meeting the parents, all of those potential wonderful terrifying moments of new relationships.  But it starts with moving forward. It’s the opposite of forgetting Leslie. Instead, it’s actively remembering her and deciding how best to move forward while still respecting that shared past.  This reboot of my “dating days” comes easier with the knowledge that Leslie herself wanted me to find someone after she was gone, and had told me so before the end. Those words brought me pain then, instead of the comfort I find in them now.  So I’ll allow myself to delight in the discovery of a great new person and try as hard as I can to keep the regrets and past mistakes I can’t control from spoiling that.  And if after all of that my dating now is judged “inappropriate,” well, I’ll just have to politely disagree.

https://whatsyourgrief.com/helping-a-teenager-deal-with-grief-2/

Helping a Teenager Deal with Grief

It’s difficult, to sum up how to support a child or teenager without being overly general because, just like big wrinkly humans, they are complicated individuals who think, feel, act, and react to life in their own unique ways.  An adolescent’s grief can be impacted by any number of things including but not limited to, their unique relationship with the individual, how the individual died, their support system, past experiences with death, and their own unique strengths and weaknesses when it comes to dealing with stress, adversity, and high emotion.  Grownups seeking to support an adolescent should try to remember that a wide range of responses are considered ‘normal’ and there’s no one formula for providing support.  Fortunately, conventional wisdom says the best way to support a grieving adolescent is to ‘companion’ them, which is just a fancy way of saying be there for them which you (hopefully) already know how to do.  You can ‘companion’ a teen by supporting them, talking openly and honestly, listening, allowing them to grieve how they want, and allowing them to decide how they will cope (with the exception of self-destructive behaviors).  Yeah I know, this sounds a lot like supporting adults.  And, although younger tweens and teens still have some work to do emotionally and developmentally, older teens (approximately 16-18) who are able to understand complex relationships and other’s points of view, are likely to grieve in the same way adults do.  We advise for children of any age you do the following:

    Acknowledge their presence, their importance, their opinions, thoughts, and feelings.
    Be patient and open-minded. Allow them to grieve in their own way.
    Be available.   Sit with the child, listen to them, and answer their questions.
    Let them know that a range of different emotions is normal.
    Validate their feelings and do not minimize them.
    Check-in with other adults involved in their life teachers, school counselors, coaches.
    Find age-appropriate resources.  Check out our favorite resources for supporting teens and young adults over here.

Now, I know anyone who’s ever lived with an adolescent is thinking, “Dude, I’m intimately acquainted with a teenager and they are nothing like adults.”

And you’re right, we would be remiss if we didn’t acknowledge teenagers come with their own set of grief considerations.  But it’s important to emphasize the above because at the end of the day our best advice will always be to walk with the adolescent through their grief while still honoring adult-ly responsibilities like drawing limits, providing guidance, and setting a good example.

Okay so back to those teenage grief considerations, when supporting an adolescent one should remember the following:
This may be their first experience with death:

For many children, this is their first experience with death.  For significant relationships, children may come to define their lives in terms of ‘before’ the death and ‘after’ the death.  After a death, adolescents may experience the following for the first time:

-  End of life rituals and etiquette:  Many children have yet to attend a funeral or memorial service well into their teen years.  Rituals and etiquette may cause anxiety for adolescents, especially if they don’t know what to expect or how to act.  Additionally, teens may be uncomfortable with the feeling of being on stage as everyone watches to see how they’re coping.
-  Tip: Prepare the child for what to expect depending on the type of services you are going to have.  Include them in the planning.  Talk about what, if any, elements they would like to be a part of and what, if any, they can opt-out of.  Encourage them to participate but don’t force.
-  Emotions:  For adolescents who have little experience with trauma, death, pain, or stress, this will be the first time they experience the overwhelming emotions related to grief.  This can be frightening and many don’t have the self-awareness to know what types of coping strategies will help.  More on emotions later.
-  Tip:  Normalize the range of emotions grievers are apt to experience.  Prepare them for shifts in emotion and give them permission to laugh and feel happy when they feel like it.  Help them brainstorm coping strategies based on their personality and strengths.  Offer options such as counseling, journaling, and workbooks, but don’t push.
-  Questions about life’s meaning:  Not all teens are ready to ponder life’s complex existential questions, but they are certainly old enough to contemplate ‘why’s and ‘what for’s in the face of a death.  This may be the first time their worldview, religious views, or sense of immortality has been challenged.
-  Tip: Allow for open dialogue about a life’s philosophical, theological, and logistical questions.  Don’t minimize their questions and help them find their own answers.  Support them in talking to religious leaders if appropriate.  Try and remember that while you’ve had years to ponder the meaning of life and death, these are questions they are only just beginning to ask.

Teens are dependent:

Most teens are dependent on adults and/or their family members for one thing or another. A death in the primary support system can cause anxiety and worry for teens because there’s the potential for things like family structures, living arrangements, finances, emotional support, and day-to-day living to change.  A death can weaken the primary support system/family structure in the following ways:

-  Loss of a parent:  The death of a parent can have a huge impact on a teen. Duh.  Okay, so which parent died?  Was it their gender role model?  Was it the parent who they relied on the most?  The disciplinarian?  The comforter?  The nurturer?
-  Tip: Consider the roles this parent filled for the child and acknowledge these losses.  You can’t replace the parent, but you may have to step in and fill their shoes to some degree.  You might become the rule enforcer or you might want to try to be more of a comforter (in your own way please, don’t be awkward).
-  If the deceased was their same gender parent, think about other male/female adults who could have a positive influence on them.  Spend more time with that person as a Crying girlfamily, or support the child in spending one-on-one time with them (Helpful Hint: Clue the adult in that they ‘have been selected’, may the odds be ever in their favor).
-  Physical instability and insecurity:  With the loss of a family member, physical stability can be threatened in several ways.  A few examples include loss of financial security, a change in housing, a new school, or fear of being orphaned.
-  Tip: Discuss the family’s status, decisions, and plans for the future with adolescents.  Tell them the truth and give them choices, this will help them regain a sense of control.  Some changes cannot be prevented, so hold a family conference to discuss concerns and decide how tough situations can be made easier.
-  Adult emotional instability:  Following death, teens may witness the adults in charge really struggle. Grieving parents and caregivers may present as extremely emotional, unable to care for the child’s needs, or unable to fill parental roles (perhaps their own or perhaps those of a deceased parent).
-  Tip:  It’s okay to grieve and show emotion in front of an adolescent, this normalizes feelings and sets a good example for expressing oneself.  But be self-aware, if your emotion is extreme it could cause anxiety for the adolescent and/or put them in the position of having to support you.  If you feel yourself losing control, it’s time to look at your own coping.
-  Parental discord: Grief can strain relationships, even if the death only affects one-half of the couple.  As a result of grief parents may withdraw from one another, argue, get their feelings hurt, and/or break up/divorce.  Complications in a relationship can have a profound impact on the child.
-  Tip:  Families experiencing extreme discord might consider seeing a Couples Therapist or a Marriage and Family Therapist.   If breakup/divorce is inevitable, be aware this comes with its own set of complications for an adolescent and will possibly feel like a secondary loss.

They have their whole lives ahead of them:

Which means they have a life full of milestones and rituals like weddings, graduations, learning to drive, birthdays, and first jobs; and they likely imagined their loved one would be a part of these.  It’s common for children to grieve these future rites of passage and then feel the loss all over again when they occur.

Tip:  When these events roll around, acknowledge the impact of the deceased person’s absence.   Let the teen (or by then, adult) know it’s okay to feel sadness even though it’s also a happy day.  Discuss and encourage creative ways to incorporate your loved one’s memory in the day/event.  Check out our posts on remembering your loved one on your wedding day here and here.

They’re searching for their identity:

A major task during teen-hood is the quest to define oneself.  What are their likes and dislikes?  What are they good at? What is their personal style? What are their values and beliefs?  Inevitably, as it does with everyone, the death of someone they love will impact how they define themselves in the present and future.   Consider the following:

-  They are the kid whose [insert relation] died:  It’s common for a teen to be the only person in their peer group to have experienced the death of someone important.  As such, they may feel alone in their experience and/or like a novelty to teens who are clueless about grief and death.
-  Tip:  Be available to talk about their experiences.  Don’t take it the wrong way if they try to ignore the loss and act like nothing has happened.  To teens, peer relationships can feel more important than adult relationships so they may prefer to talk to trusted friends rather than adults.  Offer them the opportunity to spend time with other teens who’ve had similar experiences through teen support groups or teen grief camps.
-  Do they have to take on new roles as a result of the death?:  A grieving teen may find they have to help more around the house, especially when their parent(s) are also grieving.  Teens are often asked to take on adult responsibilities like carpooling, childcare, emotional support, part-time jobs, and role model for younger children.
-  Tip:  Try to remember that younger and middle teens are not yet adults. Take a hard look at the appropriateness of the roles they’re taking on.  Responsibility is good as long as it’s age-appropriate and they still have adequate time for school work, hobbies, and fun.
-  They can feel overshadowed by a sibling’s death:  Children who’ve experienced the death of a sibling may find themselves feeling overlooked and overshadowed.  We encourage parents to talk about and remember their deceased children; just be aware that when the deceased child gets the majority of the attention, living siblings can feel jealous and worried they don’t measure up.
-  Tip:  Don’t compare.  It’s always good advice to focus on individual children and their individual strengths.  Make sure your children get equal attention and acknowledge their qualities and accomplishments whenever possible I mean, why not?

They may mask emotion or emotional expressions may look different:

Teens experience and express emotions differently than adults. Again, duh.  Your teen’s emotional expressions may surprise you, they may seem over dramatic or conversely they may seem repressed. Where emotions are concerned teens:

-  May be embarrassed about their feelings:  Often, adolescents want to fit in and go unnoticed. ‘Grieving’ may differentiate them in a way they’re not comfortable with. Younger teens especially (12-14) tend to feel there is something of an imaginary audience watching what they do; for this reason, they may be cautious about how and when they sad boys express emotions.  Teens, just like adults, may choose to grieve privately and may downplay their grief in the presence of others.
-  Tip:  Allow the teen to express their emotions when and how they like.  Don’t make them feel guilty for acting as though nothing is wrong, this doesn’t mean they don’t care.  If they’re open to your assistance, help them find ways to grieve they’re comfortable with.  Some adolescents may find comfort in the privacy of a journal, book, or a one-on-one grief counselor.  As always, be patient and follow their lead.
-  Expression of emotion may seem volatile:  Adolescents can shift moods pretty rapidly; one minute they’re happy and the next minute they’re distressed.  To some degree, these shifts in mood are due to increased hormones and their developing brains and bodies; but the extreme emotions of grief can have the mood-swing-effect on teens and adults alike.  You may find yourself scratching your head wondering what made them so upset, but they may not even be able to identify the trigger (just like adults).
-  Tip:  Try to put their emotional expression into context.  Understand the wide range of emotions associated with grief and anticipate teens may be more likely to express emotions like anger than sadness.  Try to be open, accepting, and validating of their emotions and make sure they know you’re available to talk. Seek outside help if you’re worried they’ve been distressed, withdrawn, depressed, or destructive for a prolonged period of time. Check out our post on normal vs not so normal grief.
-  May seem self-focused:  Adolescents, in general, can be very self-focused.  Younger teens especially (12-14) have a hard time taking other’s perspectives into account.  This is a skill that has to be learned as their brain develops and so they often come off looking self-centered and lacking in empathy. It follows that younger teens will have difficulty understanding other’s grief reactions when they are different from their own.  Jill’s things are important to me, how could Dad clean out her room?  I’m still sad, how could Mom possibly think about dating?
-  Tip:  Be patient.

Teens are invincible superhero’s (in their mind) i.e. impulsive crazy people:

Generally speaking, teens are far more impulsive and willing to take risks than their adult handlers.  Younger to middle teens are especially apt to feel invincible and immortal. Both teens and adults employ destructive coping mechanisms like alcohol, substance use, sex, antisocial behavior, and withdraw, but teens are less like likely to accurately assess risk and use good judgment.  Conversely, they are more likely to experiment and take perilous chances.

-  Tip:  Sometimes when a child experiences the unthinkable pain of grief, adults feel compelled to go easy on them in ways that are overly permissible and enabling.  Sometimes adults are too distracted by their own grief to notice what’s going on with their children.  Don’t let this happen – don’t hesitate to ask questions and medal when it seems necessary. Remember, as a parent, caregiver, or concerned adult it is your job to draw lines and set limits.  You won’t have control of them for much longer, so set limits while you can.
-  If you’re worried about how your child is coping, you may want to speak to their doctor, school counselor, or a child psychologist.  If they ever express thoughts of harming themselves or others you should call 911, go to your local emergency room, or call a local crisis response team.  In the US you can seek support 24/7 through the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK.

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7728339/Britains-Chief-Rabbi-WRONG-Labour-anti-Semitism-says-Jeremy-Corbyn.html

Jeremy Corbyn refuses FOUR times to apologise to British Jews as he says Chief Rabbi was WRONG about anti-Semitism in the Labour Party during a pre-election grilling by Andrew Neil

    Mr Corbyn said he wanted to have 'a discussion' with Chief Rabbi Ephraim Mirvis
    Rabbi  accused him of allowing 'poison' of anti-Semitism to take root in Labour
    Mr Corbyn said that it was 'not right' and there was no evidence for it being true

By David Wilcock, Whitehall Correspondent For Mailonline

Published: 18:58, 26 November 2019 | Updated: 20:21, 26 November 2019

Jeremy Corbyn tore into the Chief Rabbi tonight saying he was 'wrong' to accuse Labour of failing to tackle anti-Semitism as the party leader refused four times to apologise to British Jews.  In a bruising prime time pre-election interview with the BBC's Andrew Neil, Mr Corbyn said he wanted to have 'a discussion' with Ephraim Mirvis after he accused the left-winger of  allowing the 'poison' of anti Semitism to take root in Labour.  The Labour leader was challenged over Mr Mirvis's allegation that Labour's claims it is doing everything to tackle anti Jewish racism was a 'mendacious fiction'.  'No, he's not right. Because he would have to produce the evidence to say that's mendacious,' Mr Corbyn replied.

He insisted he has 'developed a much stronger process' and had sanctioned and removed members who have been anti-Semitic.  But he floundered when Mr Neil detailed specific cases of anti-Semitism by Labour members who faced little or no sanction.  He also asked the Labour leader why he had appeared on stage today with prospective parliamentary candidates who had a history of involvement in anti-Semitic incidents.   Mr Corbyn also denied that the blight increased after he took over the party, saying: 'It didn't rise after I became leader.  Anti-Semitism is there in society, there are a very, very small number of people in the Labour Party that have been sanctioned as a result about their anti-Semitic behaviour.'

But he repeatedly refused to apologise when asked by Mr Neil.  'We will not allow anti-Semitism in any form in our society because it is poisonous and divisive, just as much as Islamophobia or far-right racism is,' Mr Corbyn said.

Mr Corbyn insisted he had 'strengthened the processes' since a written warning was given to a member who questioned the murder toll of the Holocaust.  Mr Corbyn was quizzed on Brexit, his tax plans and borrowing as part of a series of BBC interviews with those vying to become the next prime minister.  But much of Tuesday's discussion with The Andrew Neil Interviews focused on anti-Semitism after Ephraim Mirvis's unprecedented intervention warning Mr Corbyn was unfit to lead the nation.  Mr Mirvis was labelled a 'sewer rat' by Corbynistas online after claiming that the vast majority of British Jews were 'gripped by anxiety' at the idea of Mr Corbyn in No 10 after the election in December.  One critic used an anti-Semitic trope, complaining of 'Israeli interference' in the election after South Africa-born Mr Mirvis's intervention.

Corbyn on...

Rabbi Mirvis's claims: 'No, he's not right.'

Wider anti-Semitism: 'It didn't rise after I became leader.'

Brexit neutrality: 'I will be the honest broker that will make sure the referendum is fair.'

Ordering the killing of the Isis leader: 'I will take the appropriate decision at the appropriate time with all the information.'

Others accused him of being a close friend of Boris Johnson, suggesting he was speaking out for party political reasons.  He accused Mr Corbyn of allowing the 'poison' of anti-Semitism to take root in Labour, saying it could no longer claim to be the party of diversity, equality and anti-racism.  Urging voters to examine their consciences in the polling booth, he warned: 'The very soul of our nation is at stake.'

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, waded into the row today by saying the rabbi's intervention should 'alert us to the deep sense of insecurity and fear felt by many British Jews'.   The Chief Rabbi took aim at Mr Corbyn for supporting a racist mural and for describing terrorists who endorse the murder of Jews as 'friends'.

Mr Welby said: 'That the Chief Rabbi should be compelled to make such an unprecedented statement at this time ought to alert us to the deep sense of insecurity and fear felt by many British Jews.'

And current and former Labour politicians also weighed in behind Rabbi Mirvis.  Jess Philips, who is defending her Birmingham Yardley seat, said: 'The only response to the chief Rabbi that is moral is, 'I'm sorry and I'll do whatever I possibly can to win back your community's trust.' So that's what I will say.'

The warning from the Rabbi came as Mr Corbyn prepared to launch his party's 'race and faith manifesto' this morning, which includes a plan to hold an inquiry into far-Right extremism.

It propose to teach all schoolchildren about the 'injustice' of the British empire.  And it accuses the Equality and Human Rights Commission watchdog which is investigating Labour over institutional anti-Semitism - of not being 'truly independent'.  In his attack, in an article for The Times, the Chief Rabbi wrote: 'The way in which the leadership of the Labour Party has dealt with anti-Jewish racism is incompatible with the British values of which we are so proud of dignity and respect for all people.'

Mr Corbyn was also pressed tonight over his plan to broker a 'credible' Leave deal with the EU and then be neutral in a referendum along with Remain within six months of taking power.  'I will be the honest broker that will make sure the referendum is fair and make sure that the Leave deal is a credible one,' he said.

'That seems to me actually an adult and sensible way to go forward.'

But Mr Corbyn was unable to say who would campaign for his Brexit deal, with much of his shadow cabinet eager to campaign for Remain.  'We would have to borrow billions to pay Waspi pension compensation,' admits Corbyn (eventually)  Jeremy Corbyn admitted that Labour would have to borrow billions of pounds for its plan to compensate million of women who lost money after the retirement age was raised.  Labour has said it would make individual payments averaging £15,380 to the 3.7million women it claims were affected by the state pension change, with shadow housing secretary John Healey saying it would reverse an 'injustice'.  It adds up to a total of £58billion to women who missed out when parity between men and women at 65 was introduced last year.  Mr Neil asked the Labour leader 16 time show he would pay for it, with Mr Corbyn finally saying they would be 'paying for it from government reserves and if necessary, because it’s not all going to be paid in one year, we will have to borrow in the long term'.

On his taxation plans, Mr Corbyn denied that a significant part his income tax base would leave the country if he took power.  'No, it doesn't crumble at all,' he said. 'They can see all around them the crumbling of public services and the terrible levels of child poverty that exist across Britain.  There is no reason why they would have to leave the country and they shouldn't.'

He was quizzed over how he would increase borrowing.  'We are not going to willy-nilly borrow, what we are going to do is deal with the worst aspects of what's happened in austerity, the worst aspects of poverty in Britain,' he said. 

Labour faces demand to axe 10 candidates over 'anti-Semitism guideline breaches'

Ten Labour election candidates should be withdrawn over beaches of international guidelines on anti-Semitism, a former party MP warned today.

Dame Louise Ellman said that they had to be removed from the December 12 slate if it was to regain 'any credibility as an anti-racist party'.

She spoke out as political group Mainstream identified 10 Labour prospective MPs who it claims have breached the International Holocaust Remembrance Alliance (IHRA) working definition of anti-Semitism, which was adopted by Labour's National Executive Council (NEC) last year.  Former Labour Riverside MP Dame Louise who resigned from the party last month said: 'If the party is to regain any credibility as an anti-racist party it must immediately suspend all candidates who have breached IHRA guidelines.'

The prospective parliamentary candidates (PPCs) identified are:   

-  Alana Bates, St Ives:  Performs in a bnd which recorded a song with the lyrics: 'Justice should not have to wait, Israel's an apartheid state, Justice should not have to wait, Israel is a racist state'.
-  Apsana Begum, Poplar and Limehouse: Shared a Facebook post accusing Saudi Arabian leaders of having 'Zionist masters'.
-  Lisa Forbes, Peterborough: Signed a letter to the NEC opposing the adoption of the IHRA guidelines because it would block the ability to describe Israel as a 'racist endeavor'
-  Rebecca Jenkins, Redditch: In 2018 she wrote 'Hear hear!' in response to the words 'All we gotta do is stand up and it's game over' superimposed over a picture of a mural that Jeremy Corbyn later acknowledged was 'deeply disturbing and anti-Semitic'.
-  Afzal Khan, Manchester Gorton: Shared a Facebook post which referred to an 'Israel-British-Swiss-Rothschilds crime syndicate' and 'mass murdering Rothschilds Israeli mafia criminal liars'.
-  Kate Linnegar, North Swindon:  Posted a link to Facebook in 2016 of an interview with political activist and Israel critic Norman Finkelstein accusing some Labour MPs of being 'Holocaust-mongers' 
-  Ali Milani, Uxbridge and South Ruislip: Posted online that Israel 'has no right to exist' and was 'built on ethnic cleansing and colonialism'. Also apologised for tweeting in 2012 '(I)t'll cost u a pound #jew'
-  Dinah Mulholland, Ceredigion: Signed the same  letter to the NEC as Lisa Forbes.
-  Zarah Sultana, Coventry South: Compared Israel to an apartheid state and accused it of 'ethnic cleansing' and 'war crimes'.
-  Louise Webberley, Totnes: Shared a Facebook post which suggested that critics of Mr Corbyn were acting against him because he was 'opposed to the murderous apartheid regime in Israel'.

'We known from history, what starts with the Jews never ends with the Jews': Chief Rabbi Ephraim Mirvis's message in full

The overwhelming majority of British Jews are gripped by anxiety. The question I am most frequently asked is: What will become of Jews and Judaism in Britain if the Labour Party forms the next government?

The Jewish community has learned the hard way that speaking out means that we will be demonised and accused of being partisan or acting in bad faith by those who still think of this as an orchestrated political smear. Yet, I ask myself: should the victims of racism be silenced by the fear of yet further vilification?

The way in which the leadership of the Labour Party has dealt with anti-Jewish racism is incompatible with the British values of which we are so proud. It has left many decent Labour members and parliamentarians, both Jewish and non-Jewish, ashamed.  It is a failure to see this as a human problem rather than a political one. It is a failure of leadership. A new poison sanctioned from the very top has taken root in the Labour Party.  Many members of the Jewish community can hardly believe this is the same party that they proudly called their political home for more than a century.  How complicit in prejudice would a leader of Her Majesty's opposition have to be in order to be considered unfit for high office?

Would associations with those who have openly incited hatred against Jews be enough?

Would describing as 'friends' those who endorse and even perpetrate the murder of Jews be enough?

It seems not. What we do know from history is that what starts with the Jews, never ends with the Jews.

It is not my place to tell any person how they should vote. I simply pose the following question: What will the result of this election say about the moral compass of our country?

I ask every person to vote with their conscience. Be in no doubt the very soul of our nation is at stake. 

Javid refuses to criticise Johnson for comments on Muslim women

Chancellor Sajid Javid has refused to criticise the Prime Minister for his use of language to describe Muslim women.  Speaking on the campaign trail, Mr Javid struggled to explain Boris Johnson's use of words like 'letterboxes' and 'bank robbers' to describe Muslim women wearing a veil, which he wrote in a column for The Telegraph newspaper last year.  It follows criticism of the Conservatives by the Muslim Council of Britain, which accused the party of 'denial, dismissal and deceit' with regards to Islamophobia.  In an exchange with reporters, Mr Javid said the Prime Minister had 'explained why he's used that language' adding the article 'was to defend the rights of women, whether Muslim women and others to wear what they like, so he's explained that and I think he's given a perfectly valid explanation'.

He added: 'Whenever this issue has come about (for) the Conservative Party, no-one has ever credibly suggested that it's an issue with the leadership of the party, whether that's the leader of the party of the day or the chancellor or other senior figures, no-one's suggested that.'

Later, Boris Johnson dismissed criticism by the Muslim Council of Britain of the Conservative Party's handling of Islamophobia within its ranks.  On a visit to the International Aviation Academy in Norwich on Tuesday, the Prime Minister told reporters that he did not agree with the claim that his party had approached Islamophobia with 'denial, dismissal and deceit'.

Jeremy Corbyn's dubious stage-mates: Labour wannabe-MPs who were caught sharing posts about 'mass murdering Rothschilds' and 'Zionist masters' stand alongside leader as he brands anti-Semitism 'vile'

Jeremy Corbyn was facing accusations of hypocrisy today after branding anti-Semitism 'vile' while flanked by two Labour activists involved in controversies involving attacks on Jews.  The Labour leader said the abuse would not be 'tolerated by a Labour government after the UK's Chief Rabbi Ephraim Mirvis said said the majority of Jews were 'gripped by anxiety' about his potential election victory.  The veteran left-winger had to dodge protests outside the launch of the party's 'race and faith' manifesto in London.  And when he finally took to the stage he showed no regret for his handling of the wave of abuse wracking Labour avoiding directly addressing the stinging criticism from the Jewish community and merely insisting anti-Semitism is 'vile and wrong'.  But while on stage in north London at lunchtime he was flanked by Claudia Webbe and Apsana Begum.  Ms Webbe, who is standing in Leicester East at the election, criticised a decision to suspend Ken Livingstone when he was mayor of London for comparing a Jewish reporter to a concentration camp guard  And Ms Begum is standing in Poplar and Limehouse in East London, despite apologising for Facebook posts including one which suggested Saudi Arabia's leaders were 'inspired by their Zionist masters'.  Also with the Labour leader was Afzal Khan, the shadow immigration minister, who apologised in July for sharing 'an anti-Semitic conspiracy' on Facebook in 2015.  Tory Health Secretary Matt Hancock said the situation was 'outrageous'.  'Corbyn, accused of anti-Semitism by the Chief Rabbi, responds by going on stage with know anti-Semites. We must stop this dangerous man.'

And fellow Tory candidate Michael Fabricant added: 'And Corbyn claims that Labour are rigorous about expelling anti-Semites. Judge him by the friends he keeps.' 

Gideon Falter, chief executive of the Campaign Against Antisemitism, accused Mr Corbyn of 'gaslighting Britain's Jews' a form of psychological manipulation that makes people doubt their own sanity.  The selection of Ms Webbe, a councillor in Mr Corbyn's Islington constituency in London, to fight the Leicester seat vacated by the disgraced Keith Vaz, prompted the resignation of a senior local party official.  John Thomas, the chairman of the Leicester East CLP, described the selection process as a 'fix' and a 'disgrace' in a letter to Labour general secretary Jennie Formby.  Ms Webbe is a former adviser to ex-mayor of London Mr Livingstone and worked on his election bids in 2000 and 2004.  She stood up for Mr Livingstone when he was suspended in 2005 for comparing a Jewish reporter to a Nazi concentration camp guard.  She wrote to The Guardian, saying the suspension 'smacked in the face of true democracy', adding: 'His history of work in the anti-racist movement is unquestionable.'

Apsana Begum's candidacy in East London was also criticised.  In 2017 she shared a Facebook post criticising Saudi Arabia and suggesting its leaders were 'inspired by their Zionist masters'.  At the time she said she had not made the post herself but shared it 'because I was concerned with the treatment of pilgrims who were being harassed in the Mecca Grand Mosque'. She said she would not use the words herself and was 'committed to fighting anti-Semitism'.  Mr Khan shared a Facebook post in 2015 when he was a Labour MEP.  It featured a video of a US comedian talking about Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu, with accompanying text describing a 'Israel-British-Swiss-Rothschilds crime syndicate' and 'mass murdering Rothschilds Israeli mafia criminal liars'.  After it was exposed he told the BBC he was 'mortified and sincerely sorry' and had not read the text at the time.  Veteran left-winger Mr Corbyn had to dodge protests outside the launch of the party's 'race and faith' manifesto in London.  And when he finally took to the stage he showed no regret for his handling of the wave of abuse wracking Labour avoiding directly addressing the stinging criticism from the Jewish community and merely insisting anti-Semitism is 'vile and wrong'.  Answering questions from reporters, Mr Corbyn was pressed on whether he had 'failed' and said he had toughened up the party's complaints process.  He said there was an 'open door' to faith leaders. 'I am very happy to engage with anybody,' he said.

But he was immediately contradicted by one of his own peers, Lord Falconer, who said it was a 'failure of leadership' that 'a lot of cases' have not been properly investigated - adding that the rabbi's condemnation was 'justified'.  The event started 45 minutes late and Mr Corbyn did not arrive until well after it began, with speakers including shadow home secretary Diane Abbott going first.   Corbynistas have been making vile attacks on Rabbi Mirvis after he delivered a devastating verdict on the Labour leadership and was backed by the Archbishop of Canterbury.  Making an unprecedented intervention, Rabbi Mirvis said the vast majority of British Jews were 'gripped by anxiety' at the idea of Mr Corbyn in No 10.  He accused Mr Corbyn of allowing the 'poison' of anti-Semitism to take root in Labour, saying it could no longer claim to be the party of diversity, equality and anti-racism.  Urging voters to examine their consciences in the polling booth, he warned: 'The very soul of our nation is at stake.'

The Archbishop of Canterbury, Justin Welby, waded into the row today by saying the rabbi's intervention should 'alert us to the deep sense of insecurity and fear felt by many British Jews'.

But both religious leaders were subjected to a vicious backlash on social media, with Rabbi Mirvis branded a 'sewer rat' and complaints of 'Israeli interference'.  Mr Corbyn arrived through the back door to the race and faith manifesto launch about 50 minutes after it was due to start amid cries of 'racist' and 'oh Jeremy Corbyn' between critics and supporters.  The Labour leader hurried into the venue from his van and through a media pack.  Mr Corbyn said there was 'absolutely no place whatsoever in any shape or form' for anti-Semitism, calling it 'an evil within our society'.  'Under a Labour government it will not be tolerated in any form whatsoever.'

He said the Chief Rabbi was welcome to come 'round the table' and talk about how to stamp out racism.  Mr Corbyn said Labour had a 'rapid process' for dealing with complaints about anti-Semitism although whistleblowers have claimed that dozens of cases have been effectively swept under the carpet.

ANOTHER poll shows Labour closing on the Conservatives

Boris Johnson's poll lead has sagged by two points after Jeremy Corbyn tried to lure voters by turning on the spending taps in a freebie-filled manifesto.  But despite Labour bouncing up the polls off their eye-catching policies, the Prime Minister still boasts a comfortable 11-point gap.  And he will be encouraged by the Kantar findings that an estimated 89 per cent of Conservative voters will flock to polling stations next month, whereas only 75 per cent of Labour supporters will bother to cast their ballots.  Mr Corbyn, who has climbed five points in the last week to hit 32 per cent, is ramping up his call for people to register to vote ahead of tonight's deadline.  His radical pitch to the electorate which promised an unprecedented peacetime cash splurge has seen him creep up on the Tories, who are scrambling to defend one of their flagship promises of 50,000 more NHS nurses.  As the December 12 crunch date looms closer and campaigning is cranked up, both parties will try to win over the undecided 19 per cent of the electorate whose votes are still up for grabs.

Mr Corbyn left the stage after his speech but later returned to face questions from reporters.  'I invite the chief rabbi, I invite the archbishop of Canterbury, I invite all the other faith leaders to come talk to us about what their concerns are,' he said.  'But be absolutely sure of this assurance from me: no community will be at risk because of their identity, their faith, their ethnicity, or their language.'

Earlier, the Chief Rabbi took aim at Mr Corbyn for supporting a racist mural and for describing terrorists who endorse the murder of Jews as 'friends'.  Mr Welby said: 'That the Chief Rabbi should be compelled to make such an unprecedented statement at this time ought to alert us to the deep sense of insecurity and fear felt by many British Jews.'

The warnings came as Mr Corbyn prepared to launch his party's 'race and faith manifesto', which includes a plan to hold an inquiry into far-Right extremism.  It also proposes to teach all schoolchildren about the 'injustice' of the British Empire.

Nigel Farage boycotts Channel 4's climate election debate

Nigel Farage has announced he will snub Channel 4's election debate in a scathing rejection letter where he accused the broadcaster of skewing their output towards a Remain bias.  All major parties have been invited to appear on the first televised leaders showdown focused solely on tackling climate change.  But the Brexit Party will boycott Thursday's hustings because it believes Mr Farage will not be treated fairly by the 'Remain' broadcaster.  In a stinging attack on Channel 4's impartiality, the party said: 'We have no faith that the broadcaster will conduct this debate in a fair and objective way.'

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-7575627/Suicidal-student-nurse-23-took-fatal-overdose.html

Suicidal mental health nurse, 23, took fatal overdose believing her death would 'save mankind of its sins' after NHS call handler failed to note her name so never organised visit from counsellor

    Melody Vazquez, 23, who had bipolar disorder, was found dead in a field
    Had previously tried to kill herself by eating poisonous berries and stabbing
    Her psychotherapist had asked the home treatment team to contact her
    But call handler failed to write down the name, so the visit was never made

By Mark Duell for MailOnline

Published: 17:06, 15 October 2019 | Updated: 17:06, 15 October 2019

An student mental health nurse took a fatal overdose believing her death would 'save mankind from their sins' following a psychiatric crisis, an inquest has heard.  Melody Vazquez, 23, who had bipolar disorder, was found dead in a field in Finchampstead, the Berkshire village where she lived with her mother.  She had previously tried to kill herself by eating poisonous berries and stabbing herself, the inquest in Reading was told.  Miss Vazquez told a consultant psychiatrist she was seeing signs that affirmed her belief she needed to end her life 'to bring peace to the world' and insisted she attempted to end her life to 'save mankind from their sins.'

She was sent home from hospital after receiving psychiatric help, without any plan to monitor her condition or a counsellor to check on her progress.  Her psychotherapist, Kay Longworth, had been so concerned about Miss Vazquez that she had asked the home treatment team to contact her, the inquest heard.  However, a call handler had failed to write down the name during a phone call, so the visit was never made. Her body was found by a passer-by on April 12 last year.  Speaking outside the inquest, her former boyfriend Adam Wilson criticised Berkshire Healthcare NHS Foundation Trust for the lack of care she received before her death.  He said: 'The opportunity to have averted this was with post discharge care - there is no discharge care, they were playing catch-up and expecting it to work.  I think the way that the trust handles this sort of thing is primarily focused on absolving themselves from responsibility. She's dead and she shouldn't be.'

Mr Wilson, who met Miss Vazquez while at Prospect Park Hospital in Reading, added: 'What happened to her is really not unusual.'

The Berkshire Coroner, Heidi Connor, also criticised the trust in a letter which was revealed via a Freedom of Information request today.  In this, she expressed concerns about how Miss Vazquez's care co-ordinator was on sick leave during the month after Miss Vazquez was discharged in January last year.  Concerns were also raised over how Miss Vazquez was given no other care co-ordinator because she was not deemed to be especially at risk.  Mrs Connor wrote: 'Evidence revealed that from around March 2018, Melody's care co-ordinator (Becky Price) was away from work on sick leave for around a month.  I was told in evidence that Ms Price's case load was reviewed by her team leader and it was felt that a substitute care co-ordinatior was not required because Melody was being seen by a psychotherapist (Ms Longworth).  In fact it would seem from ms Longworth's statement that she was due to see Melody for four sessions, the fourth of which took place on April 11, 2018.  Tragically that was the date on which Melody went missing, she was found the next day having taken an overdose.  I heard no evidence about a plan in place to review the question of whether Melody required a care co-ordination. This was perhaps even more significant given that Ms Longworth's involvement with Melody was due to come to an end.  Staff were clearly concerned about Melody at that time and they requested Crisis Resolution and Home Treatment Team (CRHTT) to speak to her.  Given the chronology in this case I did not find that this played a part in causing Melody's death but I am concerned that this could make a difference for other patients.'

Giving evidence at the inquest, Ms Longworth said the CRHTT had never spoken to Miss Vazquez because a member of the crisis team had failed to log her name.  The coroner had said: 'So, it wasn't that the crisis team was too busy or under-staffed, they just didn't note down which patient it was? Is it as simple as that?'

Ms Longworth had told the inquest time pressures at the crisis team were common, but the coroner said: 'The bottom line is that this person had the time to take the call but never wrote it down. So it seems slightly more than being too busy.'

In a response to the coroner, also revealed by an FOI request, Dr Minoo Irani, medical director at the Berkshire NHS Trust, said: 'Thank you for raising your concern about procedures in the trust for managing care coordinator sick leave, following the hearing of the inquest of Melody Vazquez.  I agree that deficiency in this aspect of our service could have implications, in general, for the quality and safety of patient care in community based mental health services in Berkshire Healthcare.  Care coordinator sick leave is currently managed by each of the locality based services through their local procedures rather than through one consistent trust policy or Standard Operating Procedure (SOP).  To ensure that all localities have a consistent approach and to take into account the concerns that you have raised, Debbie Fulton (Director of Nursing and Governance) and I requested our Clinical Director for Mental Health Services to review the local procedures in place and prepare a SOP which could be implemented trust-wide across all our community Mental Health Services.  We are committed to improving systems and processes within the trust, to ensure safe care for our patients.'

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